Dreamscapes
by Lucy Rodriguez-Hanley
From behind the blue C-section curtain, the medical staff whispered: “Unusual,” “Mermaid birth.”
“An intact amniotic sac!” my doctor exclaimed.
A transparent bubble with a baby floating in murky water was gently placed on my chest. She was curled in the fetal position, her head covered by a mop of black hair. When I tried to hold onto her, she slipped away from me. The doctor caught her and tried to pry her out of the amniotic sac.
My baby slid out of the hands that wanted to break her out of her shell. One of the nurses grabbed her and passed her around so the team could see what an en caul birth looked like. She eventually made her way back to me.
I knew I was dreaming.
My first good night’s sleep since the miscarriage.
I wanted to see what she looked like, but the amniotic fluid was cloudy and one of her hands covered part of her face. Everyone in the room crowded around us; she needed to be removed from the caul.
Panic and fear tried to take over. I vowed to protect my baby.
She moved her hand; we made eye contact.
My dream baby Houdinied herself out of her casing.
A warrior’s cry echoed through the operating room.
The deflated caul looked like crumpled parchment paper with the words “Are you, my mother?” inscribed in lavender ink.
As a lucid dreamer, I was in control of my nocturnal escapade. I believe this was also my daughter’s dream. My girl and I were on equal footing. She was there to check me out, would I suffocate her or give her space to be who she needed to be? I had nothing to ask of her, only that she please, choose me.
Lucy Rodriguez-Hanley is a creative nonfiction writer, award winning filmmaker and mother of two. She is the Chapters Director of Women Who Submit and leads the Long Beach, CA chapter. Her website lucyrodriguezhanley.com